Temerity Magazine Volume 1 Issue 2

Family, it is where politics get Grizzly!

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God bless the readers and all those who make this great Temerity Magazine possible.

Chad T. Everson

Temerity Magazine Volume 1 Issue 3

Obama ‘Sir Change-a-Lot’ in shining armor has risen!

Finally, Obama ‘Sir Change-a-Lot’ in shining armor has risen. Praise the Lord and pass the ammunition because the American public grew to hate George W. spectator.org/archives/2009/01/14/george-w-bush-winner They blamed global warming on George W. The farmers blamed their bad crops on George W., women blamed George W. when their husbands ran for Viagra, black people (oh, excuse me - I should have said, ‘People of Color’) blamed George W. for between 9.4 and 14M black Africans who were sold as slaves primarily by black African slave traders and sold to the colonies generations ago/en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Atlantic_slave_trade, George W. was blamed for the high divorce rate, the whole world hated George W. because well - they didn’t quite know why - they just knew they hated him for having been elected to serve two terms as President of the United States during very troubled times. The media hated George W. the most for keeping this country safe for 8 years since 9/11. Why? Because bad news is big business…and keeping Americans safe on American soil just didn’t cut it for papers like the New York Times who feeds on dishing out national secrets and counting the heads of dead Americans. Perhaps that’s one of the reasons their circulation is at the bottom of the barrel. But hey! We aren’t suppose to question our new Socialist Messiah. Obama ‘Sir Change-a-Lot’ in shining armor has risen and when he rose - he passed laws cloaked in poison - when he had promised transparency and truthfulness in government.  He pushed laws through by a Congress so ignorant in their adoration of this dysfunctional President - that they pass these laws without reading what they said -and worse yet - the Obama administration never explains to the public what these laws mean in common sense language, how these laws will affect their lives and then - have enough respect for the people who are paying their salaries and lifetime perks - to get some type heads up from those American people before taking a final vote. These laws are profound in their defiance of everything the Founding Fathers wrote and stood for.

But Praise God, Obama ‘Sir Change-a-Lot’ in shining armor has risen and he knows in his soul that he is the reincarnation of not only the great Knights of old but also Abraham Lincoln and maybe even the Jesus Christ.

Well, those are mighty big shoes to fill but it’s clear from his actions that Obama ‘Sir Change-a-Lot’ in shining armor has risen. All those that George W. coined as the evil empire are now in Sir Change-a-Lot’s ‘Can’t we all get along‘ Infamy Hall of Fame. Perhaps the photo below is proof enough of Sir Change-a-Lot’s ‘turn the other cheek’ love that is omnipresent, omniscient, and just downright Omnipotent - Let’s all praise the Lord and pass the ammunition. He has risen!

Now isn’t this a cozy photo op? What does it matter that Iran hates America and would love to have that destroyed trophy on it’s wall! littlegreenfootballs.com/article/34050_Ahmadinejad_Mocks_Obamas_Change_Slogan

Every night before Sir Change-a-Lot in shining armor retires - when he finally gets that heavy metal off his back, he kneels in a guarded room made private only to him in order to secure both the Christian and the Muslim votes. www.bible.ca/islam/islam-history.htm. In this secret of all secret rooms, he had a bust made of conjoined twins. One twin is Jesus Christ and the other is Muhammad. He blindfolds himself and says, “What would Jesus do?” Now being a rather impatient and highly arrogant ruler, he figures that since he gave Jesus two minutes to answer and got nothing but silence, he then says “Allah be praised…this is your game man - now what the hell do you want me to do?”

Attila the Honey - check out my online blog at www.attilathehoney.com

Join me on Saturday nights where I host GrizzlyGroundSwellRadio’s The Attila the Honey show. It’s fun! It’s topical! I’m a Grizzly Conservative in high heels! Time 7 - 8 central 8 - 9 est. Guest call in # 646 915 9997. There is the added bonus of my Uncle Sam Honey (86) who’ll play his guitar and sing. Liberals most welcome to our Saturday night free for all.

Free Range

State of the Union

Scott Stantis

Girls & Sports

Chandrasekhar Subramanian

“It was the first day of a school in USA and a new Indian student named Chandrasekhar Subramanian entered the fourth grade.
The teacher said, “Let’s begin by reviewing some American History. Who said ‘Give me Liberty, or give me Death’?”
She saw a sea of blank faces, except for Chandrasekhar, who had his hand up: “Patrick Henry, 1775?, he said.
“Very good!” Who said “Government of the People, by the People, for the People, shall not perish from the Earth?” Again, no response except from Chandrasekhar. “Abraham Lincoln, 1863?, said Chandrasekhar.
The teacher snapped at the class, “Class, you should be ashamed. Chandrasekhar, who is new to our country, knows more about its history than you do.”
She heard a loud whisper: “F**k the Indians.” “Who said that?”, she demanded.
Chandrasekhar put his hand up. “General Custer, 1862.”
At that point, a student in the back said, “I’m gonna puke.” The teacher glares around and asks, “All right! Now, who said that?” Again, Chandrasekhar says , “George Bush to the Japanese Prime Minister, 1991.”
Now furious, another student yells, “Oh yeah? Suck this!” Chandrasekhar jumps out of his chair waving his hand and shouts to the teacher, “Bill Clinton, to Monica Lewinsky, 1997!”
Now with almost mob hysteria someone said, “You little sh*t! If you say anything else, I’ll kill you.” Chandrasekhar frantically yells at the top of his voice, “Michael Jackson to the child witnesses testifying against him, 2004.”
The teacher fainted. And as the class gathered around the teacher on the floor, someone said, “Oh sh*t, we’re screwed!” And Chandrasekhar said quietly, “I think it was the American people, November 4th, 2008.””

State of the Union

Larry Wright

CAMPING TRIP

Rick was attending his 4X4 club’s monthly meeting and had just told them he couldn’t make the upcoming camping trip because his wife Jane wouldn’t let him go.

After listening to the jeers and other derisive remarks from his fellow 4X4 friends Rick left to go back home to his wife.

When Rick’s friends started arriving to set up camp the following week who should be there but Rick sitting up in front of his truck, tent up, fishing rod in hand, camp oven roast stewing away in a hot bed of coals.

“How did ya talk your wife into letting you go Rick?”

“I didn’t have to” was Rick’s reply.

“Last night I was slumped down in my chair just drowning in my sorrows. Then my wife (Jane) snuck up behind me and covered my eyes and said, “surprise!!”

When I peeled her hands back she was standing there in a beautiful see through negligee and she said, “Carry me into the bedroom, tie me to the bed and you can do whatever you want.”

So Here I am!   

Speed Bump

The Other Coast

The Flying McCoys

RedPlanetCartoons

I do not work For Obama

I know I have my fair share of typos,but I usually catch them now before I post. But some get thru.  But these are the White House official press releases, there should not be typos  on these.

The Duplex

Modern Day Abbott and Costello

You have to be old enough to  remember Abbott and Costello, and too old
to REALLY understand computers, to fully appreciate this. For those of
us who sometimes get flustered by our computers, please read  on.

If Bud Abbott and Lou Costello were alive  today, their infamous sketch,
‘Who’s on First?’ might have  turned out something like this:

COSTELLO CALLS TO BUY A COMPUTER FROM ABBOTT

ABBOTT:  Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?

COSTELLO:  Thanks. I’m setting up an office in my den and I’m thinking
about buying a computer.

ABBOTT:  Mac?

COSTELLO: No, the name’s Lou.

ABBOTT:  Your computer?

COSTELLO: I don’t own a computer. I  want to buy one.

ABBOTT: Mac?

COSTELLO: I told  you, my name’s Lou.

ABBOTT: What about Windows?

COSTELLO: Why? Will it get stuffy in  here?

ABBOTT: Do you want a computer with  Windows?

COSTELLO: I don’t know. What will I see when  I look at the windows?

ABBOTT:  Wallpaper.

COSTELLO: Never mind the windows. I need a  computer and software.

ABBOTT: Software for  Windows?

COSTELLO: No. On the computer! I need something I can use to write
proposals, track expenses and  run my business. What do you have?

ABBOTT:  Office.

COSTELLO: Yeah, for my office. Can you recommend anything?

ABBOTT: I just  did.

COSTELLO: You just did what?

ABBOTT:  Recommend something.

COSTELLO: You recommended  something?

ABBOTT: Yes.

COSTELLO: For my  office?

ABBOTT: Yes.

COSTELLO: OK, what did  you recommend for my office?

ABBOTT:  Office.

COSTELLO: Yes, for my office!

ABBOTT:  I recommend Office with Windows.

COSTELLO: I already  have an office with windows! OK, let’s just say I’m
sitting  at my computer and I want to type a proposal. What do I  need?

ABBOTT: Word.

COSTELLO: What  word?

ABBOTT: Word in Office.

COSTELLO: The  only word in office is office.

ABBOTT: The Word in  Office for Windows.

COSTELLO: Which word in office  for windows?

ABBOTT: The Word you get when you click  the blue ‘W’.

COSTELLO: I’m going to click your blue ‘w’ if you don’t start with some
straight answers! What about financial bookkeeping? You have anything I
can track  my money with?

ABBOTT: Money.

COSTELLO:  That’s right. What do you have?

ABBOTT:  Money.

COSTELLO: I need money to track my  money?

ABBOTT: It comes bundled with your  computer.

COSTELLO: What’s bundled with my computer?

ABBOTT: Money.

COSTELLO: Money comes with my  computer?

ABBOTT: Yes. No extra  charge.

COSTELLO: I get a bundle of money with my  computer? How much?

ABBOTT: One  copy.

COSTELLO: Isn’t it illegal to copy money?

ABBOTT: Microsoft gave us a license to copy  Money.

COSTELLO: They can give you a license to copy  money?

ABBOTT: Why not? THEY OWN IT!

(A few  days later)

ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I  help you?

COSTELLO: How do I turn my computer  off?

Eric Allie

Steve Kelley

Lisa Benson